Unlearning what I have learned

Image of the original Yoda from The Empire Strikes Back
"You must unlearn what you have learned." -- Yoda

How do you perceive yourself? Do you truly believe yourself to be strong and confident? Do you believe you are who you are deep down?

I’m often confronted with that question, and many times it comes up when I’m thinking about clothes. (Bear with my vain side for a moment.) Today I was chatting with a co-worker about trying on cute boots for winter.  I almost immediately dismissed the idea of buying dress boots — you know, the kind that go up to the knee or higher? — because they wouldn’t fit my legs.

Or would they?

I haven’t tried on boots in… well… years.  Perhaps over a decade. I wouldn’t know if boots would fit me because I’m a quite different person now than I was then. My maturity level is deeper. My knowledge and wisdom is greater (You get older, you get wiser.. it just happens). My physical appearance is quite different. Smaller. By, like, a lot.

Yet I still have this mentality sometimes that I have not changed, no matter what I see in the mirror. I have to stop, pause and ask myself, “Are you sure?”

It’s the same with training. Sometimes I get into this mode of thinking that just because I TRIED that exercise or weight and couldn’t do it, that must mean I STILL can’t do it.

That’s one way you get into ruts. You keep on keeping on without testing your limits. You buy the same old shoes and style of clothes year after because that’s what’s always fits. That’s what looked good then.

You forget about shaking things up. Trying something new.

My friend Steph tried and succeeded at doing handstand pushups during Thursday morning’s WOD. The night before she had wondered whether she could do one or not.  She didn’t know. She just tried it.

And it turns out… she COULD. Pretty awesome. But she wouldn’t have known had she let herself keep thinking she couldn’t.

I think it’s time for me to try on some knee-high boots.  Maybe even thigh-high. Why not? I’m feeling pretty lean these days. This nutrition regimen I’m following has had some great results. But first, Thursday’s WOD and training.

Push Press 3×5

Results: 55-70-70 (I scratched on the last rep)

Handstand Pushups
Sumo Deadlift High Pull (M 135# / W 75#)

Time: 6:54 @ 75#

This was my first time to do 75# for SDLHP in a WOD. Upping the weight totally changed the game. My form felt awful. It was like I had no idea how to do the exercise. I felt like an awkward geek going through the checklist in my head of setting up the bar, prepping my body and lifting the weight just as I had been taught (or, at least as best I could).

Andy says that happens a lot when you increase the weight. That’s why you keep working to improve — always learning. Always training. 55# is not 65# is not 75#. The fundamentals are the same, but your body feels a different weight. It must relearn how to apply the same movements and preparations to the heavier weight.

Core strength would help. After Luke was born, I worked really hard to build up my abdominal strength thanks to the help of Sifu Bren in my fabulous Kung Fu conditioning class (I miss that class still!). But I haven’t put in the same effort since Mads was born, and I can tell.  And lack of core strength affects… of let’s see… just about everything else I do.

So I’m working core training into my workout regimen. Here was last night’s:

3 cycles:
5 Turkish Get up (5 each side)
6 Deadlift Twist (6 each side)
15 V-ups

I used a 15# dumbbell for the Turkish get-up (so embarrassing, but that’s all I could do) and my 35# kettlebell for the twists. My V-ups were comical.  Hmmm… you think I need to work on core strength?

Now, time to try on boots.


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Hi! I'm Cindy Brummer. By day, I'm a web & wordpress designer/developer/content strategist. And for fun, I'm a cook, Crossfitter, novice Olympic weightlifter, and mom to two cuties. Find me on Google+.